What is My Purpose?

Over the past 4 years I’ve been living in this open ended question: what is my purpose?

I’ve jumped on a journey. I was 15 when I arrived at this question. Summer 2015, I applied for a leadership conference called At The Well Young Women's Leadership Academy at Princeton University. I had to write a personal essay. It was the first time I had to truly reflect on who I was and what I wanted out of my life. when being asked by my siblings "who are you?" I shrank. I remeber sitting there for hours, crying because i didn't know how to answer those deep open ended questions. coming from people who I, at the time, thought had life figured out. It made no sense to me that who you are, is different from what you do.

( to think of the life shifting moments that happen to me everyday though i am unaware that i am living in them is actually an insane thought. they happen but i don't know how much of an impact they will have until they do. that every single day on this earth i encounter different challenges to overcome. and, i overcome. )

who are you?

as a 15 year old, I was in discovery. aside from the boy i liked, or what syle I was to focus on, or what I was learning in math. even though those things were happening, I was facing some bigger discoveries for a teenage girl who didn't even start high school yet.

I wanted to know who I was. I was determined to make that my life’s mission: to find and fulfil my purpose.

( july 22nd, 2015 via VSCO )

Every few months I am brought back here; what am I really supposed to be doing here?

on this earth. because, of course, that is where i am.

It’s not a simple question and sometimes it’s one that I feel so far away from even asking. that at times, I am living in my own head, refusing to do my “work” that i’ve been placed here to do because sometimes it feels pointless. It often feels like I’m a hampster, running on a wheel, riding the life’s cycle with no real progression, or advancement. And in those times I feel that I have no purpose and that it is pointless to keep running. for me, in those moments, I just want to be stagnant. I want to be at a standstill so that I can recalibrate and hop back on. Because it’s one thing I’ve realized, life will cycle with or without you.

I talked with my family

today and I asked the question "what is my purpose without love?"

I wrote “Love conquers. Even tho there are basic necessities that a human needs but if we break it down to the simpler components we can find contentment in a way... I was watching a Red Table Talk and someone said that "if you've mastered poverty, the only thing you have to know how to do now is make money." Having those qualities from poverty is one thing when one is looking to have a “successful” life, learning to make money is the next step. But on my route to “success” without love I am really nothing... because what exactly is my purpose here without love? It drives everything.”

I feel we are all here to love. In whatever capacity that makes sense. for you.

everyday, as I say, I tap into more me.

it’s about finding and defining your core, staying on track and consciously fulfilling what is meant for you.

What are your thoughts? What do you feel is your purpose? Outside of your career, why are you here? On a daily basis, what does it look like trying to fulfil your purpose? (comment below)


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